So you know how everybody's been all pensive lately, recounting the year behind and facing the new one with resolve and determination?
All I have been doing is stuffing my face with this.
I count it as therapy for witnessing the Music City Bowl in person. Oh...my heart hurts as I think about it.
I'm sorry if you're not a Tennessee/college football fan/ESPN watcher.
Well maybe I'm not sorry. Then you'd know what I was talking about, and then your heart would be breaking too. And I wouldn't want that for you because I love you too much.
HOWEVER, I am determined to make the best of this year. This is going to be a year of change for me: my undergraduate career ends in May, I am (hopefully) going to find my first "real" job, and hopefully I'll have the skills to pay the bills--"hopefully" being the key word.
I'm not going to lie to you: I got a little teary at 11:45 last night thinking about the year that sits before me (I'm a live wire at parties, you know). I happen to be a worrier and a little bit of a control freak (thanks for those genes, Mom!), and I don't like looking into a cloudy, near-distant future that's going to impact how I'm going to live. However, I know that's pretty much how life is going to be--nothing in life is guaranteed, and each day is a precious gift. Lately, a dear friend has been been encouraging me to live in the moment, and I'm finding that there's so much beauty in simply appreciating each moment for what it is. And I'm consciously aware that life will not end if I don't end up with a job that I fully enjoy--or even get one right away. All I can do is work hard, pray, and make the most of what I have.
It's a good thing I enjoy beans and rice. Just sayin'.
So with all of the changes that I'm facing this year, I have deemed 2011 to be the year of courage and will strive to live by the mantra of, "The worst thing that ___________ can do is say no."
That is the very worst, right? Please don't tell me otherwise at this point. Please? I would rather just live in that comfort zone for a little while longer.
Despite my apprehension, I am excited about this year. While my brain is wrought with MAJOR CONSTERNATION at this point, my options (barring neurosurgery or rocket science) are conceptually limitless. I know I can survive living weeks at a time eating the same thing and getting minimal hours of sleep while still maintaining a fairly high level of productivity. I really like people, and I'm excited to actually put my education to use and feel like I'm actually doing something to help someone.
And...I'm ready to make more than minimum wage.
So here's to you, 2011. May I learn to adapt to new environments and unfamiliar situations, learn more about the world, and make my own whole wheat bread. I'm tired of staring at the bread aisle and debating on whether I'm going to spend $1 or $4 on edible or enjoyable starch.
And may I eat less of you.